i yearn for you to let go.

i yearn for you to let go.

the last few days were punishing, but valuable. praying to God was always one of my fortes, especially at times of trouble. i ought to be careful not to seek Him only during bad times, but also during the good. well... it just so happen that these times are harder than most trials i've been put through.

i love you with the love of the Lord. this is why love is reason enough for me. God's love is reason enough for me. reason enough to be patient, kind and respectful. but i grow weary... why? because i'm only human. no matter what anyone says, being a human being means we naturally depend on other human beings for something - anything. and sometimes, we lack the capacity to be generous. but that's all right. being under God's guidance calls us to be forgiving. i believe that it can be very hard. to forgive others, and to forgive yourself, isn't the easiest action to take in this world.

but i am always called to...

so i found the famous 1 Corinthians 13 in the bible helpful...

I may be able to speak the languages of men and even of angels, but if I have no love, my speech is no more than a noisy gong or a clanging bell. I may have the gift of inspired preaching; I may have all knowledge and undrerstand all secrets; I may have all the faith needed to move mountains - but if I have no love, I am nothing. I may give away everything I have, and even give up my body to be burned - but if I have no love, this does me no good.

Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail.

Love is eternal. There are inspired messages, but they are temporary; there are gifts of speaking in strange tounges, but they will cease; there is knowledge, but they will pass. For our gifts of knowledge and of inspired messages are only partial; but when what is perfect comes, then what is partial will disappear.

When I was a child, my speech, feelings, and thinking were all those of a child; now that I am a man, I have no more use for childish ways. What we see now is like a dim image in a mirror; then we shall see face-to-face. What I know now is only partial; then it will be complete - as complete as God's knowledge of me.

Meanwhile these three remain: faith, hope, and love; and the greatest of these is love.

***

the good news is always a refreshing truth to hear. =)

i have been fighting so many battles inside me recently... and i'm trying to find my footing once again in this world. what i hate about these trials is that when one foundation is shaken, the others seem to be affected too. i'm like... dang. can we build up on strength one after another instead of cramming it all into one? haha.

well... as long as you're happy. and so as long as the others are too. =)

so i still pray that God keeps me patient and strong. =)

because all that matters to me is that i be there for you. =)

i just love you so much.